Life companion

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You are my life companion.

Know it, LIFE COMPANION

It won’t be only a joy ride

Know it, It won’t be only smooth ride

There will be rough roads

Expect some speed breakers

Along the way,  we will have jolts

Expect some breakdowns

Sometimes we will go into reverse

But, I promise you, on the way

Even if we accept a U turn,

I will not allow us to enter a One-way.

There will always be a way,

You are my life companion.

Know it, LIFE COMPANION 

Yin and yang

YinYang
Let me tell you little secrets. Please don’t tell anyone 😉
To Him

  1. It’s ok to have a slightly bigger tummy. You can use the word “slightly” to your favor ;). It doesn’t matter to her.
  2. She knows precisely when you fool her around. She is cleverer than you think. Irrespective of your apparently original stories.
  3. Her love is genuine than yours. Believe it or not.
  4. She needs more of your time than your money or status.
  5. She likes to be seen and praised. she is  born with that urge.
  6. No. she will not understand your point of view always. So don’t try harder. Learn how to agree to disagree.
  7. Men and women are completely different species. Somewhere in history men and women went into different directions. They think,feel and live differently. So accept the differences. It is not an individual issue. It is a generic issue. Both are complementary but not the same.
  8. She likes your heart more than your looks. She is far stronger than you think.
  9. No, one plus one is not two, always. It depends on her mood.
To Her
  1.  He loves you more than you think he does. Don’t judge him based on how often he expresses it.
  2. He tries to impress you, all the time. He likes to be told he is the best. It boosts his ego.
  3. No, Love is not always important to him as much  as it is to you. His priority changes.
  4. He lives more with the mind than a heart. Unlike you. Don’t push him harder. He might break rather than bend.
  5. He does not like imprisonment. Catch him and he will escape. Tie him and he wants to run away. He needs space. If you show him you are too much dependant on him he feels suffocation.
  6. He is weaker than you think he is. He looks strong, confident and commanding. Inside he is fragile. He is less decisive. He is more dependent on you than you are of him.
  7. No, He does not like to spend money on your purses and dresses. In fact, he does not like to spend money on anything.
  8.  For him, sleeping on a couch and watching tv is more productive  than socializing.
  9. Please, he does not want to know everything in detail.
  10. Yes, One plus one is always two.

I love you, do you love me?

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Frustration in relationship is common. Sometimes it becomes more obvious and open while in other cases it stays below the blanket for the whole life. Some complain and others suffer. Broken heart, bleeding heart, feeling of  being used and cheated. Tears and tears and some more tears, seen and unseen. Heard or unheard cry.

The Special Other does not love the same way I do. I love and care more and he (I am using he and she interchangeably) is not responsive.  She does not love anymore like she use to do before.It ends up as a formal, charmless relationship or a breakup.The end of a Love affair. Honeymoon is over.

Lucky are those who can love. If you are being loved back it is your bonus. It may happen, if it does, it is your extra bonus, but If you are not being loved reciprocally, it is  not your loss. Well, you will say it is funny. How can I love someone and not expect him/her to love me back? Because love is not a business. In love, one only gives. If you expect because you have given, then there is no difference between love and business. In business give and take is the rule. In love affairs, giving is the only rule. You can love only if you are full of love. It is impossible for an empty person to love. You can only give what you have.

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Sometimes we love someone because we want to be loved. The other person is  also doing the same. It is kind of a bait to get the fish. In the beginning one can act for a while till he gets love back but it cannot continue for longer. The day he stops pretending that he loves, the love affair ends. That day,officially honeymoon is over.

Expect and frustration begins. If you don’t expect then you are at peace. Keep loving without expectation. The idea of expectation has  gone so far that it has gone into our blood and bones. We think that it is our right to expect from “the other” to behave in certain way or to love us back. What we are saying is that I love you so now you have to change the way you are. You have to love me back even if there is no love in there.

Love is highest of all feeling in the world. It can flower only in the space of  freedom. If love affair is a bondage then it will die sooner or later. I Love you the way you are. There cannot be reason behind love. If there is any reason for loving then the love is towards the reason and not towards the person. I love you because you are beautiful, what will happen when beauty is gone ? I love you because you are intelligent. What will happen to my love the day I find more intelligent person than you ? If there is reason than there is no love. Love happens without reason.

Expectation and frustration are two sides of the same coin. Let the other live the way he/she is. Do not interfere. If the other is adjusting and changing for your love, it is because of his/her compassion towards you. But do not think it is your right.

Let the love grow in the space  of freedom. You will see how it flows abundantly.

AH.

 

Do I know you ? – Relationship paradox

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Imagine a day when you are in a cold war with your partner. It will seem that she (I am referring here only “she” but it applies to both he and she) is not speaking to you properly, whatever she does seems just wrong and  against you. As if whole land beneath you is taken away. You feel shattered and unhappy. We all go through such moments in our lives with  variable depths. Let me tell you today how I have minimized such instances from my life.

The paradox is that more I know her I realize that I don’t know her: We are changing every moment. We are different and new than we were a moment ago. We constantly learn, unlearn, predict, assume, define, verify, analyse and do all sorts of things which makes us different every moment. When do we get hurt ? When we expect that our partner should behave in certain way but in reality  she has behaved in different way. So we feel that she has changed or she does not love me anymore  or she should have not said things in certain way. It is because we had expected that she should have behaved in the ways she behaved previously. She has literally evolved from her “last time”. As a matter of fact she is new and different now. If I would have accepted that she also changes moment to moment I would have not expected anything from her exactly like last time and clash could have been avoided.

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In any relationship, in the beginning there is always a charm and sweetness. It is because she was an uncharted territory. Literally. As time passes by, boredom enters. That is the time we refer to as honeymoon is over. It is as if we are going to the same place over and over. This happens because we take our partner for granted. We think that we know her. This is absolutely untrue. It is almost impossible to know her.We ourselves do not know  who we are. We are even surprised by our own behavior many times. How on this earth it is possible to know her ?images

As soon as we understand this fact that we do not know her, she is an uncharted territory, curiosity will arise. Curiosity will bring interest and there will be no boredom anymore. Everyday will be a new romantic day !